Anaheim Ducks

Last spring, I rewrote the lyrics to “My Favorite Things” from the Sound of Music, adapting it to the Kings’ situation in the Playoffs. I had a lot of fun writing it. When I tweeted “My Favorite Kings,” Patrick O’Neal, color man for Kings Live for Fox Sports West, liked it and told me he sang it. I was thrilled!

My Favorite Kings

(To be sung to the tune from the Sound of Music)

Shots stopped and gloves dropped and sweet empty netters

Stanley Cup patches on LA Kings’ sweaters

Brownie our Captain, a cunning Right Wing

These are a few of my favorite things.

Both Jons in goal on the road to the Playoffs

Richards and Stolly both winning the face-offs

Jake in the box for a hit with some sting

These are a few of my favorite things.

When the Shark bites

When the Hawk strikes

When it’s looks like war

I simply remember my favorite Kings

Will capture the Cup once more!

Foxy and Evans, O’Neal and Miller

Shorthanded goals made by penalty killers

Number eleven, that nimble Slovene

These are a few of my favorite things.

Pucks cleared and Pens’ beard and multiple hat tricks

Power plays gained off of somebody’s high stick

Nolan and Clifford both taking a swing

These are a few of my favorite things

When you lose teeth

When your team’s beat

When it’s looks like war

I simply remember my favorite Kings

Will capture the Cup once more!

Men in black jerseys who kick ass and take names

Road trips that finish a series in four games

Carts on a break’way: my heart starts to sing

These are a few of my favorite things

Lewy and Dewy, a match made in heaven

Clogging the lanes we see “old” number seven

Days with Lord Stanley and Tiffany rings

These are a few of my favorite things

When your skull cracks

When your knee’s whacked

When it’s looks like war

I simply remember my favorite Kings

Will capture the Cup once more!

I wrote a second song this spring about the San Jose Sharks, to the tune of “When You’re a Jet” from Westside Story. I liked the upbeat tempo, compared to the sort of melancholy tone of the first tune. This song was strong and masculine with an in your face attitude.

A Sharky version of “When You’re a Jet” Westside Story

When you’re a Shark

And the Kings come to town

Gonna choke, gonna fall,

Goin’ all the way down.

When you’re a Shark

You are destined to lose

It’s no walk in the park

You’ll be payin’ your dues.

You’re hardly a threat,

Your shots will be deflected.

You’re weak in the net:

When the Cup’s given out,

You’ll be neglected!

Then you’ll be done

With a capital D,

Say hello to the greens.

Put your ball on the tee.

When you’re a Shark,

You stay a Shark!

I didn’t get much of a response to that. I’m thinking, as a woman in her fifties, my taste in musicals is too old and few of my followers had even heard of that song/movie/play.

This time, I decided to choose a song from Grease, which is somewhat newer. Anyway, here’s what’s going on in the Stanley Cup Final right this moment, in song. If you know the tune “Summer Nights,” I hope you’ll enjoy it. If you don’t know the song, you should probably just skip this. LOL

The Run for the Cup

(sing to the tune of “Summer Nights” from Grease)

It’s the Playoffs, had us a blast.

Yeah, the Playoffs, happened so fast.

First to beat…San Jose Sharks

But they’re tough. No walk in the park.

San Jose, determined to win,

Saying we should all “fear the fin.”

Well-a, well-a well-a, huh.

Did they choke? Did they choke? Did they lose to the Kings?

Did they choke? Did they choke? Lose their chance for a ring?

Sharks played hard, they took the lead.

Won three games, were poised to succeed.

Then the Kings turned on the jets

Crushed ‘em hard. Put the pucks in the net.

Shamed them all so they’ll never stand tall,

But uh-oh, next up is the Ducks.

Wella, wella wella, huh.

Tell me more, tell me more, did the Ducks show their “might?”

Tell me more, tell me more, did they put up a fight?

Teemu tried, tried real hard

To beat Quickie, get past his guard.

Getzy, Perry, Koivu did too,

But they failed and couldn’t break through.

Playoff drive kept us alive

But uh-oh, the Blackhawks are next.

Wella, wella wella, huh.

‘Hawks are rough, ‘Hawks are tough. Can the Kings beat that team?

Is the Cup in ’14 nothing but a pipe dream?

Saad and Shaw, Toewsy and Kane

Brought Kings players nothing but pain

Tied with three games, only one more…

Kings prevail! Martinez scores!

Four more games, the Cup to reclaim

But the Rangers are ready to fight.

Wella, wella wella, huh.

“They’re so great! They’re so quick! They’re Original Six.”

We don’t care. We’re LA! Really don’t give a shit.

(slower)

Here we are, three games to none.

We’re determined to finish the run.

Thinking back, it’s hard to conceive

We could win, if we all just BELIEVE!

With the Cup,

once just isn’t enough.

This is it, Stanley needs to come

(deep breath for the big finish)

Hooooommmmeee!

Time to score, time to score, time to scooooooore!!!

Look at the bottom left of the photo

I’m taking recent events in the NHL as a sign from God that I’m on the right track. My first hockey novel, On the Surface, features a former Blackhawk who is traded to the San Diego Barracudas because of an incident with a fan involving a water bottle.

Now, keep that in mind as I tell you that this spring, the water bottle has been the weapon of choice for NHL players.

Corey Perry of the Anaheim Ducks sprayed water into the glove of one of “My Guys”, Jeff Carter.

Shawn Thornton of the Boston Bruins sprayed the visor of Montreal Canadien PK Subban.

And finally Henrik Lundqvist of the New York Rangers gave Pittsburgh Penguin Sidney Crosby a little mid-game shower.

It’s like an epidemic. It’s harmless really. It doesn’t hurt anyone (except wimps, as you’ll see below). It’s just annoying. However, so far the hydro-taunting has been player vs. player. A few days ago, that changed.

Corey Crawford of the Chicago Blackhawks got fed up with a heckler–JUST LIKE IN MY BOOK–and sprayed water into the face of the heckler–JUST LIKE IN MY BOOK!

Well, that last part isn’t quite accurate. The back cover copy, over which I had only minimal input, says Tim threw the water bottle at a fan. In reality, I never fully describe what Tim Hollander does to the fan with his water bottle.

But still!

What are the chances that real life incidents almost completely mirror what I wrote a year ago? Like I said, I take it as a sign from God that my time has come and I’m on the right track. I also bask in the knowledge that what I wrote is utterly believable and possible in the real NHL.

It feels pretty damn good.

The LA fan (yes, he was rooting for LA. ) claims his eyes were irritated by the saliva backwash–from the type of bottle that squirts from a spout. He’s filed a police report. What do you think about that? Feel free to comment.

Photo credit: Paul Sakuma, AP

Three Musical Tributes to the Kings

A Real Life Bottlegate!